After losing my son, I never realized that I was stepping into the unknown and that I will be going through so much pain, analysis and despair. I am learning so much. Sorrow makes me think deeply and reveals hidden depths within me that I did not know ever existed. I am hoping that some good and beauty will come out of my pain and my tears. Maybe my most sorrowful days will be among the best days of my life. When Paul the Apostle said "none of these things move me" he did so because he has been through so much suffering. I feel like Paul in a way regarding the things of the world. I am free as never before.