I grieve, I cry, I wail, I scream, I sob, I yell, I pull my hair, I beat my chest, I then sleep. I wake up and the cycle continues. Because I love much I hurt a lot.
There is no end to sorrow when you lose your child. I lost David. The number of years does not matter. Time stands still. Memories continue to emerge. The pain never goes away. The missing increases as time goes by. In time people seem to forget about the loss. They do not mention it. They do not remember his birthday or anniversary. They do not talk about what he did or used to do. They act as is he was never on this earth. Yet as a mother he is daily with me. I see him everywhere even though he is nowhere. I ask him "why did you go away?" Daily he occupies my soul. Daily I look for him. Daily I remember him. He becomes more beautiful day by day.