I am tired

I am tired of trying to find reasons why my son died. I am tired of trying to figure out what to do next. I am tired of trying to keep extra busy in order to survive. I am tired of life. I am tired of everything. There is no thrill to anything. I am tired of being so lonely. I am tired of feeling all alone. I am tired of crying. I am tired of pain. I am tired of people telling me that David is in a better place. I am tired of being told that I am strong.  I need help. Sometimes I get periods of being OK, but these are so short. When I talk to people I feel OK at times and then I am alone again. I just cherish all of David. I cherish everything that he stood for. I cherish his beautiful soul.